Ah, the great and beautiful ritual of a weekend breakfast: eggs, buttery toast, coffee, papers, a careful post-mortem of the night before. A pretty watertight formula, right? Well it turns out there was room for improvement.
London Restaurant Brew have launched a 'breakfast in bed' service at their shiny new Putney branch. This doesn't mean a waiter pops out of your wardrobe to take your order - that would be handy on a hangover - but rather you can now book a squashy double bed on the cafe terrace to lie on, Caesar Augustus style, while a personal waiter ferries you bacon, eggs and champagne. Oh hello.
In case you're wondering, the bed in question is more 'chic, bedouin-inspired' than 'Benson's showroom', with stacks of stone-coloured cushions, knitted blankets, a faux-fur throw and a very Scandi-inspired log fire cut into the decking in front of it to keep you toasty. Book the bed and you'll also get to skip the usual breakfast queue (which is useful as Brew is always rammed at the weekend) and head straight to your bed where a private waiter will bring you some champagne to kick things off. Like I say - very decadent.
This is a breakfast for people who like to drag out their weekend breakfast for as long as possible. First up is a little starter platter of sushi bites - as we were eating closer to midday this didn't feel like a shock to the system - then you can go ahead and order whatever you like off the main menu. I had my favourite poached eggs on sourdough with a side of lemony avocado, my companion W had chorizo folded eggs and herbs, which is a good option if you find eggs on toast a bit bland (I don't). If you're not too stuffed by the end of it all the breakfast in bed package also includes pudding. Blondie bite or blueberry cheesecake, anyone? By the end you'll probably be feeling so full you'll need to lie down. Again.
A breakfast in bed worth getting out of bed for.
"Breakfast in Bed" at Brew costs £200 for four people (all day Saturday and Sunday only) and includes a bottle of Bollinger Champagne, personal waiter and dishes from Brew’s “breakfast in bed” menu.
By Lucy Pavia / @lucypavia