Hey everyone, this one’s for you (unless for some inexplicable reason you don’t like tacos, in which case back to your NutriBullet)... A new cleanse has been invented which consists of only eating stuffed tortillas.
The Taco Cleanse, written by Wes Allison, Stephanie Bogdanich, Molly R.Frisinger and Jessica Morris, has already sold incredibly well, grabbing the attention – unsurprisingly – of the Internet crowd.
The idea arose when the self-proclaimed ‘taco scientists’ discovered eating only tacos for 30 days was beneficial for your health. By beneficial, it’s not talking about weight loss but mood-improvement.
It’s not 100% pain-free, only about 86%, as of the 75 recipes in the book, all of them are vegan so this is a plant-based diet, free from meat and dairy. (Though this is made up for with the ‘Margerita supplements’.)
The book says that we should eat a breakfast taco, within three hours of waking up, to ‘anecdotally proven to erase the ill effects of the previous night’s toxic indulgences’. At lunchtime, the taco produces an ‘uplifting sensation’ and ‘increased glow’, while your spicy dinner taco ‘stimulate[s] nocturnal imagination’.
We’re hundy p on board but, if you find youself falling off the taco bandwagon (mmm), their Instagram account is full of inspirational quotes like 'The world will provide the taco I need', 'Every taco I eat is the perfect taco for the moment' and 'Make today's taco amazing'.
The philosophy behind it, in short, is ‘cleanses are the f**king worst’ and we shouldn’t constantly deprive ourselves of our favourite foods.
The Taco Cleanse website elucidates on the subject: 'Did you try the Master Cleanse and feel hungry all the time? Did South Beach leave you cold? […] Did you climb on board the Paleo train only to learn that cavemen didn’t ride on trains? Finally, there is a new diet plan that will have you actually be able to stick to.'
With claims that it realigns chakras (yogis take note) into an ‘optical taco pattern’ and guarantees ‘a glorious beard for the formerly hairless’ (hipsters take note), it’s even caught the attention of the celebrity world:
I'm on day 3 of this taco cleanse and have only gained like 10lbs— Spencer Pratt (@spencerpratt) January 5, 2016
And even Jennifer Aniston is said to be ‘riveted’ during an interview with Yahoo Food. Well, as a self-respecting fitness fan, who wouldn’t be?
While we can’t see Jen An swapping her green lean life for a Mex fest 24/7, with The Taco Cleanse: The Tortilla-Based Diet Proven To Change Your Life 'available wherever fine books are sold', we think this might be the first diet we don't require her endorsement for.