It's World Milk Day and at a time when everyone's got an opinion — passionately for or against — what better way to celebrate than have a fight over our morning news meeting then write long essays about the stuff...
PRO MILK - by beauty writer, George Driver
In the words of Ron Burgundy, 'Milk was a bad choice'. Or so everyone wants us to believe. As a firm fan of that old friend Lactose, I'm here to sway us all back to our original semi-skimmed ways, because, to me anyway, milk is great.
As most of the best stories begin, it all started when I was a kid. No, I'm not about to launch into a fan rant about my mother's commitment to breastfeeding, fear not. I'm talking about when milk was delivered by hand (yes an actual human's job was to deliver milk – supporting local employment, gosh milk you've done it again). Every morning before school I'd go to the door, collect the milk bottles from the porch and hope that today was the day it would be my turn to steal the cream off the top of the full fat bottle. Sounds idyllic, right? I promise this was in 1998 not 1898. But to cut a long story short, cereal became my go to breakfast food and to this day I'd still rather eat a bowl of Frosties with ice cold milk than avo on toast. So sue me. It also happens to be my ultimate hangover cure, so there's just no turning my back on milk, even if I wanted to.
And Iet's not even mention all the amazing foods that would be lost without good old milk. Two words – Ice. Cream. Yup, you take away milk and that comfort tub of Phish Food goes too. Soz. Sidenote: If you even mention vegan ice cream as an actual thing a) you've obviously never tried real ice cream because you still think the vegan imposter tastes nice and b) I will inevitably have a little less respect for you. #Awks. How about your fave bar of Dairy Milk? I'll give you two guesses what goes into that. Rice pudding, milk shakes, custard, you name it, take away milk and what's for pudding? It'll have to be icky fruit. Eeeew.
I haven't even touched on why it's good for you. Bring on the science! A source of calcium, Vitamin D, B and A and a good whack of protein, milk is the gift that keeps on giving. Yes, it's super cool to suddenly have discovered a food intolerance (if I manage to get through dinner without someone 'casually' mentioning they're totally intolerant to lactose, it's a great and surprising day) but in reality no one ever died from a cold glass of 2%.
So raise a glass (of milk) to Milk! May you forever defy healthy hipsters with your deliciousness.
CON MILK - by digital writer, Rebecca Gillam
I do try not to be preachy in my day-to-day life, because it pretty much always goes down badly, but there are LOADS of legit reasons not to drink milk.
In fact, there actually aren’t many reasons to drink it (what's that? Oh, a boring alert)…
#1 – People get hyped about milk as it’s essential to strong bones and teeth and lots more important stuff that isn't actually true. Though people play the calcium card, we get hardly any nutritional benefits from it, especially when it’s pasturised, and some studies even found it can make bones MORE brittle.
#2 – It’s pretty gross. Dead stuff, eggs, milk — it all comes in the same category of unnecessarily gross stuff to consume. There are those disgusting stories about pus being in the milk we buy (vom – it’s can happen when the cows get mastitis, a mammary gland infection), and other stuff getting in it you 100% would not want to drink.
#3 – Milk isn’t so hot for the cows. They can be kept in pretty undesirable conditions — tiny, dirty, stressful, with innocent little cow babies being taken away from their mum's and killed when they stop producing milk.
#4 – It’s not too brill for the environment — it uses a CRAZY amount of water and the methane cows produce is doing pretty permanently bad things to the ozone layer. (Just watch Cowspiracy.) Yes, people find it boring but eye roll at hipsters or LA chillers all you want — it’s hapnin'.
#5 – It’s not so great for us. Even if you ignore the potential intolerance thing, which people seem to get particularly pissy about, it’s high in fat and cholesterol, and it’s been known to cause skin issues.
#6 – I get the mass hate for all things trendy — whether it’s vegan stuff, nut butters or dairy alternatives — but when it comes to environmental stuff, they’ve kind of got a point. Hate on hand tattoos, sure, but not something that’s doing actual good.
#7 - Do you REALLY love milk that much? I just think it’s kind of gross, it goes off in about a day and it’s not really worth it. And p*s in your tea? Disgusting.
What's YOUR verdict? Comments below plz...