Is doesn't quite work out like this...
Oh, the 90s bodysuit - or 'body' for those of us in the fashwan know - can be a tricky thing.
Pioneered by the ‘90s ‘Super’ elite (Cindy Crawford, et al), the body became every girl’s wardrobe go-to. Perfect worn underneath your Kookai powersuit, or rocked standard with a pair of acid-wash Levi 501s, the ‘90s body was standard style fare. Come on, Kelly Kapowski in Saved By The Bell? She owned that shizz.
Fast forward to 2016 and the ‘90s body is offish back. Gigi, Kendall, Bella – which new gen model ISN’T rocking an all-in-one these days? And well, we want in. Only, there isn’t a manual with these babies, and they aren’t the easiest of garms to negotiate…
Sure, you throw on a bodysuit and feel all svelte (for like, the first five minutes), but this ‘90s trend has it’s own full set of major pitfalls, some of which have been outlined below.
Have any/all of these happened to you?
(Bet you Ky-Jen doesn’t have to put up with this s***)
1. Popper rub
Swank bodysuits have poppers rather than velcro, however, when those poppers start to irritate the lady garden area? Ouchy.
2. Toilet troubles
That situation when you've had one too many vinos and you have to dash for the toilet... and have forgotten that you are wearing a body. That cubicle scrabble is TOO real.
3. Coming loose
Poppers coming open without you realising... then walking around unawares that the body is now over your jeans, and you are strolling around looking like a toddler waiting for a nappy change.
4. Bus wedgie
Sitting down too fast on public transport when wearing a bodysuit can be somewhat uncomfortable.
Yeah, not nice. At all.
6. The pants issue?
Does one wear knickers under a body? Doesn't really look too sexy does it?
7. And finally, re-fastening
Re-fastening a body is never gracious, especially when out. Ever had someone notice you fiddling around, trying to re-pop? Yeah, just looks like you have a bit of a problem. Zero sexy points.