The 6 Most Ridiculous Presents In Gwyneth’s Goop Christmas Gift Guide

The 6 Most Ridiculous Presents In Gwyneth’s Goop Christmas Gift Guide

Goop's Christmas Gift Guide is here, and it's absolutely ridiculous. Think 9 months of toilet essentials, a trip quite literally around the world and a step up from your festive game of Monopoly.

Goop is known for it’s, umm, interesting take on life, and their 2015 Christmas Gift Guide is no exception. The presents might be amazing, but the prices are absolutely insane. We count down the top 6 most ridiculous presents you’ll probably never be unwrapping under the tree - if you're looking for something a little more affordable, check out our Christmas gift guide.

6. Tatcha Atari Gold Massager, $195
Need a new face massager? This Goop suggestion is coated in 24-karat gold leaf, and promises to “awaken skin, release tension and detoxify through lymphatic cleansing”. We’re pretty sure it will, but at that price we’ll just stick with our occasional facial…

5. Canoe Condom Dispenser, $42
A Goop gift we can actually afford?! Oh, wait… we’re all for safe sex, and can even appreciate that sleek stainless-steel design, but we’re not so sure who we’d wrap this up for (especially if they’re opening presents with their parents). A definite upgrade from the wallet, with German efficiency apparently.

4. Vintage Ball and Chain, $1,500
There is literally no reason why anybody would ever need this (in 2015), and we’re guessing wives and girlfriends will not appreciate the joke. That’s a lot of money to be put in the doghouse.  

3. Hermes Mah-Jong Set, $46,000
Why play Mah-Jong on your laptop if you can whip out this luxury Hermes version of the classic game instead? It's a definite step up from our tattered Scrabble, but there’s a waiting list for this special-order item. If you can afford it, that is.

2. The Standard For Josephier Toiletries, $956
For the friend who has it all, apparently. This super-luxe toilet paper gift set isn’t all about the bog roll, also featuring 32 packets of tissues, 10 Gentle Cleansing tissues and 5 packets of Extra Balancing Care sets, “raising the bar on the definition of a well-groomed man or woman”. This 9 month supply might even take you through to next Christmas.  

1. World View Exploration At The Edge Of Space, $90,000
Yep, Gwyneth Paltrow wants you to actually go to space – or near it, anyway. This two-part trip will will start in Tuscan, Arizona, where you will meet the team behind the project. Then in 2017, you’ll take a trip with five companions to experience 360° views of earth in a high-altitude balloon. Not for people with a fear of heights, then.

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