Beauty Assistant George Driver's peepers are petite to say the least...
In an ideal world, I'd be a size 8, hourglass figure with 32C boobs, a plump pout and Mila Kunis-style come hither eyes. I know, no one else has ever said that…
But as generic as it is, it's the truth. Now realistically, I'm never going to be a size 8 (these hips were made for birthing), I can't grow boobs from nowhere (oh 34A my trusty friend) and surgery is just out of the question, even if I was suddenly thousands of pounds richer and didn't have a student loan looming over me.
So, having been blessed (cursed?) with absolutely tiny eyes - Pokemon and piss holes in the snow are just two of the more endearing descriptions I've received over the years - I'm determined to at least use the beauty tricks of the trade to fool this part of me into looking more impressive.
Bring on the beauty hacks!
Small Eye Issue No.1
Without eye makeup I look full on blind (see above). A combination of tiny eyes, heavy lids and blonde-tipped eyelashes are a killer.
A slick of the best mascara ever, DiorShow, and a sweep of pale eyeshadow across lids, in the tear duct and under the brow bone help to open my tiny peepers up and fool colleagues into thinking I'm actually awake on a Monday morning.
The Expert Opinion?
Makeup pro Ruby Hammer - 'Adding a little shimmer to brow bones and the inner corner of eyes and focusing your mascara on the outer lashes will give the illusion of bigger eyes.'
Small Eye Issue No.2
The phrase bright eyed and bushy tailed pretty much never applies to my face, even if I've had a full night's sleep and ignored that second glass of Prosecco (well it is Wednesday). If you've got small eyes, opening them up and adding depth is the way to look wide awake.
More mascara is more. A second layer of Chanel's volumising mascara lifts lashes and reminds your face that your eyes do actually exist. A nude eyeliner on your lower waterline gives the illusion of wider eyes and looks less sci-fi than white. Add extra depth to your lids by sweeping light brown eyeshadow into the crease in an arc-shape.
SMALL EYE ERROR: Applying mascara quickly is our nemesis, always carry cotton buds to clean up inevitable smudges on your eyelids.
The Expert Opinion
Makeup pro Ruby Hammer: 'Good eyelash curlers and a nude eyeshadow palette are great for small eyes -curled lashes and softer shades make eyes look bigger.'
Small Eye Issue No. 3
Whenever I venture into liquid eyeliner territory, I do it with trepidation. Between imprinting an identical second line on my eyelid and spending hours on the perfect angled flick, it can be more hassle than it's worth.
When it comes to liquid eyeliner on small eyes, less is more. Keep lines thin and graphic otherwise you'll end up with black holes instead of eyeballs. A pen eyeliner makes creating an amazing cat eye way easier.
If in doubt, reach for the credit card. No, not to employ a personal make up artist (a girl can dream) but to get a straight edge on your cat eye, just hold against your cheek at a diagonal and follow the line for an easy fake flick. Just make sure you've got plenty of cotton buds on hand for any (inevitable) mess ups.
SMALL EYE HELPER: Liquid eyeliner is a great way to cover up any excess mascara that's made its way onto your lash line. Nothing to see here...
The Expert Opinion?
Makeup pro Ruby Hammer: 'Heavy eyeliner all around the eyes rarely looks good on small eyes, so avoid!'
All of the above and M.A.C Fluidline Pen (coming soon!)
Small Eye Issue No. 4
The dreaded smokey eye. Hard enough to DIY when you've got normal size eyes, my petite peepers just hate a smokey eye. Well when you've got little to no eyelid space, Kylie Jenner style smokey eye contouring and highlighting just doesn't work so well. But if you can't beat them, join them. Make your small eyes a statement by upping the feline factor and going ultra-alluring. Eyeballs are overrated anyway.
Enter the lazy girl's smokey eye. Two products. Super simple. After applying your usual mascara on top and bottom lashes, take a dark brown eyeshadow (yup, when your eyes are this small, a black smokey eye is your enemy) and sweep across your eyelids, focussing more colour on the outer corners and crease. Take your brown eyeliner and do a rough line along your top lashes and flick up to join your eyeshadow at the edges.
Use an eyeshadow brush to blend this into the eyeshadow by lightly buffing. Keep applying as much as you like until you've got the required smokey eye. Now the bottom - use the eyeshadow brush to buff a little of the brown shadow under your bottom lashes. Don't worry if it falls down a little, just buff it out and think smokey! Blend the outer corners up into your top lid. Use your brown eyeliner along your waterline and into your tear duct to create a feline point. Et voila!
SMALL EYE ERROR: If you get over excited and take your eyeshadow too far up your eyelid, use some concealer or a cotton bud to get rid - just keep it in an arc so it follows the shape of your eye.
The Expert Opinion
Makeup pro Ruby Hammer: 'Avoid really dark single shades on eyelids, brown is better, and make sure you blend, block colours will make eyes seem even smaller. If you do use a darker colour, concentrate it on the outer crease line to help define your eyes.
PRO TOP TIP: 'For special occasions invest in some eye drops - they add sparkle to your eyes.'
For a liquid eyeliner recommendation that'll help you on your way to faking big eyes Powder has got you covered.